My escape
There are days like today,
when the heaviness gets heavier
Which memories I should chose to open
Of happier moments, of a time when you were with us watching over us
a laughter, a meal, a conversation,
Or the memories that shall torment forever.
Of you slipping away slowly, of your fingers grasping mine, of seeing you for the last time.
These heaviness gets heavier on a day like today
This wish is different.
It knows it may remain just a wish.
Yet,
It is not the same.
After the longest time.
It is made by a weathered heart who stop believing in them.
It is the first ray of light,
After the darkest days.
This wish is different.
Without realising,
Slowly,
Something is replacing.
What I thought will never leave.
These words are new,
They are flowering in the winter of my heart.
But shying away from reaching the paper.
Never try to reason,
What you don’t know.
Never ignore,
What you can’t.
Resenting.
Avoiding.
Distancing
Forgetting.
Done it all.
And yet.
Bared from what tied it.
Do not let that heart wander.
May not find way back.
Didn’t think there can be a day like today,
When I see the past fall back.
My heart which awaits no more.
The wounds sealed.
The memories matured.
When I realised I’m not writing about you anymore.
Against a mist of memories,
I’m stepping away.
Against an easy life,
I trace a difficult path.
Against unfulfilled dreams,
I dare to dream again.
When my mind knows no boundary.
When my pen seeks a paper.
When my emotions befriends words.
When my eyes see you.
When my heart feels a beat again.
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